Bloggers, comments and expectations

May 01, 2006 Published by Tyme White

I said before that bloggers usually don’t have a plan when they decide to blog. Yes, they have a general idea of what they want to do but the details aren’t sorted out. If a person hasn’t blogged before it’s hard to understand the little things that can turn into huge situations if the blogger allows it. I said before that I don’t consider a blog a “blog” unless there are comments. IMO, web sites initiate a conversation. Blogs can initiate and continue the discussion. Blogs are an improvement to web sites, not that web sites don’t have their place. They do. Comments can be a nightmare unless the blogger understands the rules.

The more people that read the site, the more people there will be that disagree with the blogger.

This is common sense. No one is perfect and our differences as people makes us unique.

People are going to think what they want and it doesn’t matter if it’s logical or not.

Bloggers need to realize that there are people who will look at the sky and it will be red every time. Why? They want it to be red. The important thing is that the blogger looks at the sky, realizes it’s blue and does not get caught up in the red theory.

The power to change comes from within. Bloggers don’t have the power to change the minds of other people.

Bloggers have the power to influence, some more than others. To be influenced, an individual must have an open mind. No open mind, no influence.

What does a blogger do if there is dissention on their blog? Listen. Explain. Leave it alone.

That’s all a blogger can do. Bloggers should always listen to what their readers are writing, otherwise why have comments? If commenters do not agree try to explain your position. It’s amazing the things that can be learned during discussions like this and it is quite possible the discussion might move on to something else that is relevant to the discussion. If the commenters still don’t agree, that’s their right. The blogger has done what they can do, life goes on. If the blogger is smart he/she might learn something from the situation that will make them a better blogger. Get more interaction. Make their blog better. The blogger will realize how rare true interaction is, the loyalty the commenters are displaying coming back to the site commenting.

There is one final rule: Never write when you’re upset. Walk away from the computer, take a drink (away from the computer), go for a drive, work out, eat…do something, just keep the hands away from the computer. Odds are the blogger will only make things worse.

And with that, I end this and open up comments which have been closed here. I appreciate and love you guys and gals. Thank you.

Related posts:

  1. Golden Rule #3
  2. Do You Know The Bloggers You Read? Do You Care?
  3. Why blogs have to have comments
  4. Stay on topic and that influential bloggers list is bunk
  5. Comments, conversations and peer pressure

26 Responses

    1. Sharon Says:

      Excellent entry. One shouldn’t write when they are upset. Or drunk. I see that a lot on personal blogs. The person will write while drunk then take it down.

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 10:55 am

    2. Gwen Says:

      What’s up with people blogging while drunk? Once it’s out there unless the blog is dead someone will read it, a search engine with spider it. Dumb move.

      Wise advise Tyme. Guess you learned something, eh? :)

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 11:24 am

    3. Felicia Says:

      That’s all a blogger can do Tyme. Can’t change other people, only yourself.

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 11:34 am

    4. Michael Z. Says:

      You know what’s odd? A lot of bloggers don’t say anything in the comments. People comment and it’s like talking to a brick wall.

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 11:37 am

    5. Tyme Says:

      Michael - I used to be like but that’s because I didn’t truly understand the value of communication in comments. Forums yes, comments for some reason I felt they were different.

      Yes that logic is twisted. :)

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 11:38 am

    6. Angela Says:

      What do you think about bloggers that delete comments they don’t agree with?

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 11:40 am

    7. Felix J. Says:

      I hate that but I can understand it in some cases like if a commenter said something malicious against another commenter or the blogger. There’s a difference between being mean and disagreeing.

      I don’t like blogs where everything is rosy. It’s not normal.

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 11:45 am

    8. Jared Says:

      Ego plays a big part don’t you think? Being able to accept that someone doesn’t agree with you? With most things there isn’t one right or wrong way to do something.

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 11:50 am

    9. Arnold G. Says:

      It takes a strong person to agree to disagree. Most people (in my experience) can’t help but try to persuade the other person into siding with them. Like the sky is red example. If I really believe the sky is red and my mind is closed to the idea it’s blue, it’s a waste of time trying to convince me.

      Yet I see this happen on blogs all the time. It’s impossible to hold a decent conversation when someone has a closed mind.

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 11:56 am

    10. Tyme Says:

      The thing to remember is that when you encounter someone with a closed mind, it’s a one way conversation. It’s not a dialogue anymore - not an exchange of ideas. It’s like talking to a brick wall.

      That’s when a blogger should say “Ok, time to move on” and change the subject.

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 11:58 am

    11. Brian Says:

      It takes balance to know when to continue and when to let go. I noticed on some sites where the blogger closed comments when things didn’t go their way. Wouldn’t it be lovely if we could always do that?

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 12:32 pm

    12. Charmyn Says:

      I hate when bloggers delete comments. They are always caught so I don’t see thwy they bother.

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 1:43 pm

    13. Dennis Says:

      What’s worse - some moderate comments so only the good ones get in. Why have comments if it’s not a true conversation?

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 1:44 pm

    14. Kathy Says:

      What’s why I don’t read weblogs inc. because they delete comments. The entire point of comments is to continue a discussion no matter where it goes.

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 5:35 pm

    15. Daniel Says:

      Supposedly WIN deletes comments that are off-topic. I found that they delete comments they don’t like.

      That’s a question: what does a blogger do when the comments go off-topic?

      Posted on May 1st, 2006 at 6:12 pm

    16. Dale Says:

      I heard WIN deletes comments. Seesm very hypocritical the way Jason mouths out about other companies/people.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 8:51 am

    17. Frank B. Says:

      If comments go off-topic I think the blogger (and the blogger is anal about that) the blogger should remind people to stay on topic - not delete comments. Deleting comments doesn’t give an accurate picture of the conversation.

      In a real-time conversation if someone says something we don’t like we can’t delete it.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 8:53 am

    18. Phillipe Says:

      I don’t understand why some bloggers have comments open. Example: link blogs. How many link blogs actually have comments? The reader clicks over to the site and leaves the comment on the linked site, not the originating site.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 8:55 am

    19. Felicia Says:

      LOL @ Phillipe. Never did understand that. Like I’m going to go back and discuss it there.

      Bloggers delete comments because they don’t like what they read. Period. Any blog network that doesn’t allow open honest conversation about their network doesn’t get my pageviews.

      Of course 9rules isn’t like that is it?

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 8:57 am

    20. Marvin Says:

      9rules takes the good and bad. 9rules has balls (well, you know what I mean Tyme right?). Tyme has shown me the 9rules light.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 8:58 am

    21. Rhonda Valies Says:

      I’m curious how many bloggers actually consider the readers when they start a blog. Many of them don’t seem to be well thought out.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 10:05 am

    22. Frank B. Says:

      Didn’t you know Rhonda? The current trend is that plans aren’t needed. Launch and sell out.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 10:07 am

    23. Marcia Says:

      Who thinks that Frank? Are these kids? No plan? What a dumb ass thing to think. Sorry but it is.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 10:08 am

    24. Colleen Says:

      I think they figure they can copy another business model and sell quick before an actual plan is needed. Dumb yes but it has worked in a very small number of cases.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 10:09 am

    25. Raymond L. Says:

      Small number of cases is the key phrase. Most don’t work. It amazes me how many companies don’t have a Plan B.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 10:10 am

    26. Darlene Says:

      Woot! #1

      I miss “it” too. They say all good things come to an end.

      Posted on May 2nd, 2006 at 10:32 am