When I feel like it. I’m serious, I don’t have a set number.

When I was growing up, when someone retired they quit their job and never worked again. Today things are very different. The retirement age is higher, people are able to work longer and more important (being realistic) people have to work longer to survive.

But those things have nothing to do with why I don’t have a set age for retirement.

I’m not the kind to retire, sit on my ass and do nothing. I’m not a workaholic like Oprah…I guess I’m more like Dave Winer in this regard. He has the wealth (it seems) to not have to work but still dabbles in different projects. I think most people have an unrealistic view of retirement. The common image that comes to mind is relaxing, enjoying the world, life with little problems or worries. That is not what most people experience when they retire and I intend to enjoy life right now.

Have you noticed wealthy people don’t retire? I noticed this when I worked in the accounting field. Unless born into money the wealthy don’t have a problem working and actually enjoy it. I learned through experience that with increased wealth comes increased responsibilities, obligations and expenses. Fortunately for the wealthy, they usually don’t mind dabbling in new projects. It’s how they created their wealth in the first place - with a strong desire for success.

I guess a better question for me is when do I hope to be in a position where financially, I no longer have to worry about expenses? I’m getting close to the number…I better get cracking, huh?

The connection eventually wins out Tyme. I cannot speak for the ladies but men crave the connection. When we get it we might hesitate for a while but the connection does eventually win.

Let’s talk about a “connection” for a minute. First, let’s define a connection:

• the act or state of connecting.
• the state of being connected.
• association; relationship

A connection isn’t one sided. If there is a connection both people feel it.

Whaaa?

Yeah, I said it. Connections aren’t one sided. If a man has a connection with a woman it is because…

wait. for. it…

The woman has a connection with him as well.

Which is why “the connection always wins because men crave it” statement makes no sense. If the man feels a connection with a woman he’s already in the door, she has a connection to him as well. If he opts out in acting on it, then he is essentially closing the connection and the door to the relationship. There isn’t much she can do if the guy ignores the connection.

Because it takes two to tango.

The flip happens as well where the woman might opt to not pursue things. Men aren’t always at fault, just most of the time.

My point: if a guy feels a connection to a woman most likely she feels a connection as well. If he knows when she’s upset, frustrated, happy, etc. she most likely can sense the same things in him. If he’s thinking she’s hot she’s probably thinking the same in return. If he’s desiring her like no other she’s probably desiring him as well. If he’s crying on the inside how can someone with a connection be happy? That’s what makes it a connection: being “connected” they can go through just about anything together because breaking the connection doesn’t feel right. They always find their way back to each other no matter how much pain, frustration, etc. they overcome (how else do couples get to “death do us part?”).

And that is where the problem lies with the person who opts not to act on the connection no matter what the reasoning is. The gut reaction should be to hold on to the connection not dismiss it because a connection like that might not ever come again. There is no reason not to act on the connection. True all connections/relationships don’t last forever but nothing in this life does. Treasure the good times and see where it goes. That’s the real question: is the reason why the person opts to pass on the connection more than the possibility that it all works out just fine?

What do you do if you feel a connection to a person who won’t pursue it? There isn’t anything you can do because the person isn’t ready for the relationship - otherwise the person would dive in instead of running away. As stated in the comments pushing the issue doesn’t work, it will most likely make the person retreat further. More work is put into denying it than if the two people just let things naturally run it’s course. If you’ve ever had a connection like that you’ll now what I mean. It just slides into a more intimate territory naturally just like the connection was created. That’s the beauty of those types of romantic connections - when they happen, they are strong and it’s natural just like making love to the person you love. Not acting on it doesn’t make the connection die so it is silly to deny what IS.

This goes back to my last entry: what should be versus what IS. If there is a connection then:

1) Both people feel it.
2) The connection exists. It IS there so ignoring isn’t an option because…
3) The other person knows you’re doing it and when you do that…
4) You’re hurting the person you love/connected to.

The “connection wins” isn’t a valid statement. The connection already “won” because it exists. The person with the insecurity doesn’t realize (or is afraid to believe) the other person is feeling the same thing.

“Love is supposed to start with bells ringing and go downhill from there. But it was the opposite for me. There’s an intense connection between us, and as we stayed together, the bells rang louder.” - Anonymous

Jack meets Jill. Jack and Jill have a platonic relationship, have fun when the go out…really good vibe. One day when Jill mentions she has a date, Jack realizes he’s jealous of her going out with other men. What Jack doesn’t realize is that she felt the same way about Jack (non-platonic feelings) and decided to see other people to help make those “inappropriate” feelings go away. Just hanging out they got to know each other on a different level than if they dated and a connection formed. You can insert a reason why the feelings are “inappropriate” (nothing illegal or immoral now):

Jack is Jill’s best friend’s brother.
Jill is his best friend’s ex-girlfriend.
Jack and Jill work together.
Jack and Jill have different (opposing) religious beliefs and their families would freak out.
Jack lives in Alaska and Jill lives in Aruba.
One of them is rich and the other is poor.
They are complete opposites of each other.

I could go on, but the “inappropriate” feelings go against what normally would be advised on what one “should” do given the circumstance. Jack and Jill never acted on their feelings because acting on them isn’t what they “should” do. If the feelings don’t go away (the circumstance does not change) why does “should be” overrides “what is” - the current situation?

Who gives a damn about what “should be”? Seriously, how can what SHOULD BE (but isn’t) override what IS? The key in this scenario is that Jack and Jill didn’t act on their feelings and the feelings didn’t go away. That makes them (the feelings) real - they endure time. It’s not impulse, it’s not foolish emotion - so why not act on it?

If your parents want you to be a doctor, you tried going to school to be a doctor but in your heart you want to be an artist, if that desire doesn’t go away why not pursue being an artist? Because it is something you “shouldn’t” do?

If you want to move overseas but you would be leaving family and friends behind (you are advised you “shouldn’t” move out of the country because you would be alone), if you really want to move will the desire go away or will the desire get stronger? If it continues to get stronger won’t you become miserable if you don’t try?

If you try the relationship/being an artist/relocating/insert-whatever-circumstance-here and it doesn’t work out, you tried. You pursued it. You fulfilled a goal. You most likely learned something. Probably had some good times. The truth: the other situation wasn’t working either so what is there to lose?

The Two Coreys have a lot of “should be” crap going on between them that conflicts with what “is”. When I thought about it more, don’t we all have that to some degrees in our lives?

The question is: why do we let it stay that way?

Popularity for the right reasons

There is a teenage girl named Kristina that likes to sing. She creates YouTube videos of her singing. She has almost 7000 subscribers on YouTube and 15K friends on MySpace.

Except she can’t hold a note. If you read the comments on her MySpace page you’ll see things like:

“I don’t think I actually know a more talented person than you, Tina.”
“damnnnnnnn you’re a hotttttttttttie!!!!!”
“hey tina! I really dont understand how you could possibly be single!?! are you lying to us?? if not, lets go out sometime.”

But she has fans! The truth: she’s amusing to watch. Her delusion on being a singer one day is puzzling to the point of being fascinating. Her defense to the people who comment on her singing is that they are jealous of her. She’s just making videos, she’s not hurting anyone but if she seriously thinks because she has fans that she shouldn’t take some singing lessons to improve her voice then she is hurting herself.

That’s what happens in online with bloggers - they begin to believe the hype the echo chamber spits out.

Are you like Tina?

Don’t get me wrong - I wish Tina the best but sometimes what we want and what we have the ability to do are two different things. Just as the echo chamber can give a false impression of popularity, validity in the niche, expertise, etc. stepping out the echo chamber can result in a bitch-slap. If you notice Tina has comments off on her videos - because that would result in her stepping outside the echo chamber. The minute she opens comments the negative comments pour in, kind-hearted people try to explain to her that she could use some singing lessons, or that people are laughing at her…but her mind is closed and her closed mind could cripple her from improving. Especially since she has 22K people following her that can make it easier for her to believe she is better than she is.

You know, deep down, if you’re like Tina. The question: do you have the balls to admit it?

The 9 Sites

Chixe - For the ladies
Decaflon - Where the geeks hang out
Drawar - Design and pretty stuff
Dud3s - For the guys
Fenxy - Movies, TV, Gossip…fun stuff
LooseSuits - For the business person in you
TwoCredits - 360, PS3, Wii…got skillz?
WingColors - Politics and commentary
Wriging - Blogging and writing resource

Some back history…

When I first came on board 9rules it was as a member so I always had a different perspective, one could say a detachment, to 9rules. I’ve said many times that because 9rules was Scrivs’, long before anyone else was on board, I viewed it as his baby and whatever vision he had, I would help him to achieve it. That was my mentality. It was the wrong mentality. When the idea came up to add social features to 9rules I was giddy about the idea of having social features on a site, I was hesitant to put it on 9rules because I saw conflicts - like the 9rulers community and a blog…it made no sense because they were competing with each other. If I couldn’t get a blog to disappear you can imagine the quick rejection of putting the social features on another domain. However, I thought about it, came up ideas on who to make it work, made suggestions to the guys and got caught up in the idea as they were. Being the content person I saw problems…quickly.

For a site, content and brand are key

People visit sites for a reason; they are getting value from the site. Normally it breaks down into:

• Entertainment
• Education
• Ego
• Interaction

Gaming sites are an example of entertainment. News and Wikipedia are examples of education. Twitter is an example of ego (easier to get followers - the followers they can’t get on their own blogs), Facebook is an example of interaction.

The problem with adding social features to 9rules is that people were used to using 9rules as an education resource, period, because that was the way it was built. It’s easier to add education to interaction or entertainment than interaction to education. The people who want to learn most likely want to grab their knowledge and leave - it’s an uphill battle.

With the new sites they have the potential to be any of the above to a user. Some visit the sites to find links to cool articles. Others might come to engage in conversation. Others might feed their ego by being a leader in the community. Others might lurk the site, amused by the conversations or are curious about what is going on and not interact at all.

Understanding why people are visiting a new site is crucial when building it.

The sites are up, now what?

The first instinct when a person launches a site is to get traffic (people) on the site. This isn’t a bad thing but there is one serious question one should ask before going on the traffic hunt otherwise the site owner will have a very bumpy road ahead:

Is the site able to actively compete with the competition?

The competition has users on their site, the type of users you want on your site. Does your site have want it takes to pull the users from the competition to your site? I know, you’re thinking you want “people”, but in truth, you want the people your competition has because your competition is most likely pulling new people every day because it is established. Is your site strong enough to stand on its own?

Any answer other than YES (a STRONG YES) means you’re in for a bumpy and frustrating ride getting traffic (and keeping traffic) on the site. The time is better spent preparing the site for the traffic it will have.

Right now, the sites visually look different but are incomplete. Look at Chixe for example, no logo, no brand, no tagline…does it have the content and features that will draw women to it? No, it’s incomplete, I know it’s incomplete, the guys know it is incomplete. Now that the site is launched (on its own because the content was originally merged on another site) it is time to shape the site into it’s own “being”. If you remember that is how 9rules was launched and one of the keys to its success. From the beginning it had a logo, a brand in mind…a purpose and a goal. Once the key features are locked down, promoting the site (and locking those ideals into the minds of users) is much easier.

What next?

Having just gone through sites for 9rules and realizing the importance of having everything in place to make that strong impression prior to trying to get serious traffic on the sites, I will be working on building the sites. Let’s get something straight…just because Scrivs said, “we need to divide 9rules into multiple sites” doesn’t mean I said, “cool, let’s do this…”.

Wait, I did…but I also thought long and hard about it. Did I want to do it? Did I have the time to do it? Was I skilled enough to do it? Did it really make sense to do it? Did I want to do it (yes, it’s worth repeating)? How was I going to do it? Were there financial repercussions and if so could I weather those? Did Scrivs really understand for this to work the sites have to be independent of each other? Did I have the time to do it?

I asked the tough questions before seriously agreeing to make sure I could bring 200% to the table. It means I’ll be traveling, promoting, dealing with advertisers (ughhhhh), managing, being the “bad” guy, interacting, making tough decisions…but having a lot of fun.

In conclusion…thought it was never coming, eh?

I hope you guys stick around for the journey. It’s going to be a fun ride. Looking back adding social features to 9rules wasn’t a “failure” because we learned something - an important lesson people aren’t listening to. By being one of the first to do it I learned that adding social features to an education site most likely will not work (listening Fast Company?). I learned that I have the strength to make the tough decisions (the participation agreement implementation wasn’t a mistake - we had 95% accuracy on who was going to stay and who was going to leave). I learned that my business instincts are solid. I learned I am ready to push and test my limits.

And I learned I have two crazy ass partners.

Time for another blog.

I know, I can hear you guys saying it now, “Here goes Tyme AGAIN changing domain names…” but you’re wrong! I’m not changing domain names…I’m adding a domain name. I’m going to share my reasoning with you.

Target Audience

The majority of my audience knows me and I suppose have similar interests as me. Unfortunately, those interests clash, particularly for the topics I’m going to discuss. For example, on Tyme Said the audience likes relationship type articles. When I write about the web, it’s sort of off topic. That does not include Business, Games, Technology…if I wrote about those things it would bore you guys to tears.

Future Goals

With the possibility of a book on the horizon I need to keep informed on those issues….you know all the non-relationship stuff. My need to do it and my desire to do it match so…it must be done! Tyme Said is not necessarily the place to do it.

Adult Topics Follow You…

Tyme Said has been tagged as a porn site in StumbleUpon, which shows up on Google. Frankly, I could give two shits about it but trying to undo it is more of a pain than it is worth and it could impact my future plans. It honestly isn’t worth fighting it. I also want the new site to have a PG rating.

Sooo…Onward We Go…

I have a new ill domain I’m not ready to announce yet. Don’t worry, it will have a crappy design, a kick as name and lots of attitude. You know, the usual. I will when it is ready and I hope you stick around and join in on the fun.

The Facts

Bill talks about pair bonding a lot on his site. So we are all on the same page this discussion is about when a man has significant feelings for a woman (this could be reversed but I’m talking about it from a female’s perspective) and wants the woman to be exclusive to him. This usually gravitates to a relationship of some sort whether it be boyfriend/girlfriend, engaged or married. We’re talking about two people who want to pair bond.

The Situation

Flirting. I don’t have a problem with flirting as long as it is platonic. For example, the guy that tells women they are pretty - men that do this treat all women the same. He says his compliment, the woman says thanks (kind of blows it off), it dies right there…the flirting that is. That’s innocent flirting to me but I realize for some people “innocent flirting” is too much.

The flirting I’m talking about is when there are “feelings” on either side. For example, if the man allows another woman to continue to think she has a shot at being with him. Or attempting to make himself desirable to other women. It doesn’t matter whether or not he is doing it in front of his girl because, if the couple has a true connection, his girlfriend/wife/significant other will sense it and if she’s smart, prove her case. See, few men can control their reaction if the flirting female is mentioned because, if something is there, he will react to it.

That’s a problem.

The Bitch Slap

In my world when I am in a relationship the man turns into a king and I treat him as such. I have his back when he needs it, stand by his side, help him to be the strongest man he can be (means emotional support), if he has kids I treat them as my own, invite his friends into my home and by default my boyfriends benefited from my relationships…and that doesn’t include the sex because I have never told my significant others I wasn’t in the mood for sex. And let’s not sidestep this, unless the guy out banks me, he will receive certain benefits just being with me because I’m not petty about shit like that.

If I’m handling my business taking care of my man, why does another woman’s feeling matter? Seriously, we aren’t in a triangle relationship it’s a pair bond. End game why the fuck did these chicks matter? Looking back, I realize how foolish I was. Let’s put this in perspective. While I was paying for a guy to go to school, paying his bills, buying motorcycles, escalating his lifestyle, taking him on trips, sexing him up…and let’s not forget cooking for him, helping him with his career/school, taking care of his kids, being that woman he could take to work functions, take home to Mom and she knew her son was well taken care of….some chick that, end game didn’t matter, was up in our mix because he he had a crush.

I realize people will have attractions to other people because I’ve been in those positions but I made a choice - my guy - the one that mattered. If I felt things were heading in an inappropriate direction (meaning, a conversation my man couldn’t sit in on) I nipped it right away out of respect for my relationship. Respect for the man I loved. Otherwise I wouldn’t have been treating my king like a king, would I?

But I didn’t get that back.

That’s a problem.

The Solution

If you’ve been in a similar situation there are two possible solutions:

1) The guy corrects the situation.
2) The guy says nothing is going on.

I created a third solution of, if the situation persisted, ending the relationship but today I realized the REAL problem.

If you have to ask a person to do right by you the truth is you are with the wrong person.

The relationship is broken because in a pair bond relationship triangles don’t work. The guy was acting on his feelings, the feelings that shouldn’t be there.

I spoke about Rog before and if you followed me long enough you know the history. Essentially, thousands of miles away I could sense the presence of other women. I could feel when he had sex. I could sense when he was lying to me. When he did these things it was like hurting himself because I was apart of him. I have the utmost respect because, when the shit hit the fan, he told me the truth and risked me walking away. He respected me enough to put my needs first and work with me to resolve the issue. We are best friends and we can tell each other anything but that bond was created by going through that pain together back then.

I Learned My Lesson

Talking with Bill I realized that if a man is truly fulfilled no one else will matter but “you” and that is when it clicked for me. When I sensed these other women I would become insecure because I didn’t understand why, with all I was doing, these chicks mattered. The irony is that, in the end, they didn’t because it was a passing thing. None of them (and I do mean none) compared to what I was offering my ex’s. The true irony was that the other women were like fail-safes, a parachute in a way that in the end. When my ex’s needed something, wanted to celebrate, was hurting, wanted to evolve/grow/change…I was the one they came to. These chicks were the “fun” and did they last? No.

Because life isn’t all about sex and fun. Wouldn’t it be lovely if that was the case?

Moving On

I can put up with a lot of shit but I know my one pet peeve is another woman seriously thinking she has a chance with a man that supposedly loves me, I’m working my ass off to make happy and my man doesn’t put the chick in her place. I’m cool with friends of the other sex but I’m not cool with hidden relationships going on. When I love a man any of the other men in my life know to treat him with respect and I don’t do anything my man would have a problem with. Because none of the men in my life would have been cool with me desiring, being happy to talk to, flirting in a sexual way, or encouraging a man to think he could be mine. How can love and more importantly trust grow with that shit going on?

It can’t.

I won’t make the same mistakes I made in the past. Even if it hurts me to my soul…I deserve better than that. I prefer to be alone.

And you know what? This is probably going to piss you guys off but now that I figured this out, it sort of healed me in a way. I have nothing else to say about relationships but I have a lot to say about social interaction on the web! Yeah baby!

To D:

Thank you for being a catalyst for me waking the fuck up. In return I offer you this piece of advice - make a choice and stand by it. You have a wonderful woman in your life and she knows you are crushed over another. If this other chick means “that” much to you, break up and move on. If she’s not worth enough to lose the woman you love, kick the bitch to the curb.

Speaking of 9rules, I decided to write an entry on what we “do” since others are writing the “Round 6 is open” articles. We’ve gone from having one site to two (with more on the way) and there are misconceptions on what we “do”…so let’s clear those up particularly since our roles have shifted a bit.

Mike

Mike’s is the design guy - he makes the sites look pretty. He has a tough role because when people see the sites they see his work and as everyone knows the design leaves an impression on the viewer. The benefit: if he nails the design the first time (which he normally does) he’s “done” (for awhile) outside of management responsibilities we all share. If his design isn’t well received, then it’s hell but that hasn’t happened except one time and looking back, we didn’t “rush” to change it. Scrivs and I aren’t so lucky….

Scrivs

Scrivs does almost all of the programming now. At one time they shared the programming responsibilities but things shifted to Scrivs doing the programming. This was a natural shift because (as hinted on the front page of Chawlk) Mike has a more design responsibilities now.

Scrivs is the IA guy so he works closely with Mike on designs. I’ll tell Scrivs the feedback I received from our readers/users, tell him my thoughts, he listens to suggestions Mike might have then goes to work formulating content placement which is why when Mike initially does a design it usually differs from the final design.

Tyme

My role shifted the most recently. I deal with member issues (9rules and Chawlk) but now I’m taking a more active role in the maintenance, development and progression of the sites, which excites me to no end. Scrivs sat with me and we went through 9rules and made IA decisions. I actively work in the database and I even made .htaccess changes. I know for designers/programmers this is minor league but I’m neither one so it means a lot to me that Scrivs trusted me enough (over and above my own fears) not to blow up the site.

The hard part

As I mentioned above Scrivs and I aren’t as “lucky” as Mike when a site launches. Usually what happens is that people see the site, says it looks great and say we all did a great job. People assume Mike did everything which isn’t the case (although we understand that). Scrivs rarely gets, “Man, you nailed the programming on this!” and I never get “Tyme, you improved the off-topic content ratio by 57%”. We do get (Scrivs in particular) the things that needs to be fixed, changed, etc. but usually it is not design related (meaning a launch brings more work). It was a tad rough at first but I had to remember that it balances out in the end. Scrivs and I often receive (separately and jointly) requests to stream, do a podcast, bicker in Notes or Twitter, etc. so in truth, we all have our moments to “shine”.

Hopefully that clears some things up…

…on what we “do”. We have a lot of stuff coming out shortly and I’ll be talking more about those projects and how we “do” things, because I know you guys like that stuff. *shrug

I will be writing more later about it. Scrivs trusted me to do some .htaccess stuff. People, I almost passed on when he asked me to do it. More coming…I promise.

GO GO GO

A Reason: People come into your life for a reason. How long are they meant to stay in your life?

A Season: It’s your turn to share, grow and learn. A person comes into your life to meet a need you have expressed. To help you through a tough time, to help you emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Once the need has been met, your desire has been fulfilled…their work is done. Your prayer has been answered…it’s time to move on.

A Lifetime: Lifetime relationships teach lifetime lessons. Realize the lessons and apply them to other aspects of your life. Love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Know Your Role

I think the problem many people have in many types of relationships is the unwillingness to accept a person’s role in their life. A person meant to be in your life for a season will not morph into a lifetime person. I think there are signs, distinct signs, of the lifetime people in our lives.

Many of my good friends I met online (I just realized it’s 5 to almost 10 years I’ve known these people…wow!), not locally. Most online relationships (romantic and platonic) are seasons but with these people we went through things together. If one of use was “down” there is no way in hell we wouldn’t be there, even during the busiest of times we’d reach out to each other with a phone call or email…”do you need anything?”, “how are you doing?” or a simple, “I was thinking about you, what’s UP?”. We celebrated good times together, went through bad times together and we went through tough situations together.

People treat you the way they feel about you and sometimes that might be hard to grasp if the person isn’t meant to have the role you want them to have. I personally am not the clingy “try to change someone” type so if I get an inkling that I might have someone in the wrong role I will quickly rectify the situation (meaning even if it kills me, I’m gone - holla at ya later). I know through experience the person you have to “please, baby please”, bend over backwards, stretch yourself inside out for isn’t a lifetime person so I don’t do it to anyone and I try to stop guys from doing it to me.

Online Interactions Blurs the Picture

Social sites (and I’m talking about those of a personal nature like Facebook or MySpace) have the option to add “friends”. How many of those people are actually friends vs. complete strangers? For the longest time on these sites all information was distributed as if all friendships were created equal. Just because you interact with someone on a regular basis doesn’t mean you’re “friends”. It doesn’t mean the person can be trusted or that you even know the person as well as you think you do. You will see “friendships” questioned on a daily basis online.

Why do most online relationships fail? They were never meant to be lifetime relationships and the signs of that are usually obvious early on. In my experience online “love” starts when one of both people are going through a tough time, are unhappy with their life, etc. and they bond with someone they think has a similar situation or common interests. It can feel like the real deal, that lifetime person except for a couple of problems. The two people don’t “really” know each other and if one (or both) is going through an unhappy time in their life, the minute the situation is correct, the relationship quickly begins to die, leaving the other person trying to hold it together. Understanding it was a season relationship, that you were meant to help someone through a tough time (or vice versa) and that’s it…that can be hard to swallow. It doesn’t make it any less true, does it?

Which is Why Offline Relationships Seem More Real…

Offline (local) relationships are easier to determine the role of someone. For example, you probably know the person you are dating is great for right now but that irritating habit the person has stops the person from being a lifetime romantic partner. That irritating habit the person knows he or she has is easier to mask online. Offline, looking the person in the eye, it is more challenging to mask the things we want to hide. That doesn’t mean that offline relationships are stronger than online ones. It means people are messed up and if a person has to be around you to act right - they aren’t a lifetime person, how can they be?

It’s Time For a Reality Check

Thanks to the internet we have the opportunity to meet and learn from people we would have never met in the past. More important, our connections to people we never thought would be known become public. We can keep in touch with our friends out of the country, make new friends everyday, find love, start businesses - we can it all online if we want. Those that are successful with their interactions, both offline and online, keep things in perspective. 95% of the people you encounter are not meant to be in your life for a long period of time (either as a friend or romantic interest). The 5% that are? You’re blessed to have them. Recognize who they are, respect them and appreciate them.

There…you got your relationships entry. You guys happy now?