Valentine’s Day: The Real Deal
Quofda Question: What do you think of Valentine’s Day?
I just figured out why I don’t like Valentine’s Day. It’s time for a Tyme Rant.
Valentine’s Day is supposed to be about showing appreciation to the people that love them (note I didn’t say the people we love). Usually it is a significant other in their life. Who exactly deserves this appreciation?
- Is it the person that hasn’t done a damn thing for you but might be cute, funny or good in bed?
- Is it the person who expects something but doesn’t talk about giving something back?
- Is it the person you want to be with, and while flipped out like a dumb ass, hasn’t realized that the person not only doesn’t compliment your life but drains from it?
- Is it the person who, while you consistently support and show love, doesn’t reciprocate?
Hell NO! Yet, how many of the Valentine’s wishes go out to these people who don’t deserve it? Men are so broken they give on Valentine’s Day by habit to stay out of trouble because it is expected. The people above can receive some candy on Sweetest Day.
Weak.
Valentine’s Day was about showing appreciation to the person who goes through the good, the bad, and the ugly with you. The person who earned the appreciation on Valentine’s Day. The person that helps make you strong. If the person is reciprocating the love, their partner in life will show their appreciation as well. Then Valentine’s Day becomes mutual and special.
Instead it has become the make-up day for slacking by purchasing an expensive gift. Or spending time together because it is expected. Or the ultimate slap to Valentine’s Day - giving “love” to someone undeserving of it.
Valentine’s Day was about love. Not puppy love or a crush, but about that very rare emotion love. It’s easy to like someone and convince yourself you love them, people do it all the time. One would be surprised how often people are used as a distraction to avoid hurdles in one’s life. Valentine’s Day is a reminder to take an honest look at one’s life, evaluate if their focus is worthy of the attention and if not, act with the swiftness rectifying the situation.
Unfortunately, Valentine’s Day has become commercialized and the meaning has been lost. I wish there was a statistic for how many men are purchasing something for a woman who, if they could get away with it without penalty, deep down would have preferred not to or could get something else. Or how many people are with one person but secretly longing for someone else. Or how many women are busting their butt to give on Valentine’s Day for a man that doesn’t truly appreciate it.
Thankfully, I control what Valentine’s Day means to me and can block out the noise. I know one thing, I won’t be pressured into acknowledging Valentine’s Day for anyone who wasn’t 120% deserving.
Related posts:
TheNiceGuy Says:
Hell NO! Yet, how many of the Valentine’s wishes go out to these people who don’t deserve it? Men are so broken they give on Valentine’s Day by habit to stay out of trouble because it is expected. The people above can receive some candy on Sweetest Day.
You try telling her that you aren’t getting her something because she hasn’t earned it yet lol. I feel you though. Did I wish you Happy Valentine’s Day?
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 11:42 am
Helene Says:
Here here! A couple of my friends are jumping through hoops today because they have to.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 11:57 am
Curious George Says:
That’s the word. V-day isn’t special anymore. It’s just another "buy me something" holiday. Special is the perfect word to describe it.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 12:16 pm
Your Man Says:
Happy vday Tyme! Are you forgetting the manipulative nature of the female?
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 12:18 pm
Snoopy Says:
Are you forgetting the manipulative nature of the female?
A man never forgets. A woman plays like she doesn’t know.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 12:26 pm
Kenny Wilson Says:
Happy day to you Tyme. :=)
What you are saying is if we don’t waste our time on people that don’t matter we won’t get stuck in the Valentine’s Day trap? Makes sense but some loving is better than no loving right?
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 12:29 pm
SugarDaddy Says:
  _.-"""""’.Reply - Quote
              _.-"""""’.
              .;__       `\
              /  `\       |
              ;a/ a `’. _  |
    ,_       |/_      _) / .-.-.
   {(}`\     \.___,    \.’  |  |
    ‘–”-.(  \_ _    /     \ /
          .-\_ _."-…. ;_      `  .-.-.
           _/ ‘–.       \         |  |
         ."\   _/\ ,   |          \ /
        /  \_.’ /’./   ;           `
        \__.’ ‘-./  ‘  /
       __/      `\    /
     .’ “""–..__\___/
    /                |
    |   ,           |
     \   ‘;_       /
      \    \`’-…-’
       \    \   |     __
        \    \  /—–; ‘.
      .–\_.-"\        |   \
 jgs /        |._______|\   \
     \_____,__/          ‘.__| .;__       `\
              Â
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 12:40 pm
SugarDaddy Says:
_’-._
    {`–.-’_,}
   {; \,__.-’/}
   {.’-`._;-’;
    `’–._.-’
       .-\\,-"-.
       `- \( ‘-. \
           \;—,/
       .-""-;\
      / .-’ )\
      \,—’` \\
      jgs     \| Â
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
SugarDaddy Says:
.--.---.( \'--'/ )
( '..-...' )
'.'-._.'.'
< '-.,.->
`\( _
< \ / \
__ \\|_/
/ \ \\
'--'.\ >
\\
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
SugarDaddy Says:
I give up lol. It’s not doing it right.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
Phillipe Says:
@10 stop showing off!
True Tyme but today it becomes very clear when that special person is missing. Maybe that’s why people do it.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 12:52 pm
Morna Says:
I’m one of the demanding women. I deserve a day of appreciation! If this day wasn’t here I wouldn’t get anything at all.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Frank M. Says:
I gave my wife the pot set she’s been dying for and we are going out to dinner tonight. She gave me golf clubs. Not very romantic but we gave each other what we wanted. We love each other very much. We’ve been married for 8 yrs and we’re expecting our first kid.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
Lisa Says:
My boyfriend and I are ignoring today. It’s just another day. We’re going to do something special like we do every weekend. Very good points Tyme.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
Felicia Says:
Happy Valentine’s Day! {{{{{HUGS}}}}}
*claps hands for Tyme
Remember when you received a heart-felt email, a poem, or something small but thought out from the person you loved? I miss those days.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
Tyme White Says:
Thank you for the Valentine’s wishes.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
Kelley Strom Says:
My boyfriend had candies sent to me at work. It was a nice thought because he knew my favorite candies would help a fucked up day go by quicker. We have no other plans besides a quiet dinner.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 2:13 pm
Rashid Says:
Lots of bloggers saying they don’t get into the valentine’s day hype but the holiday is still popular. Do you think they are saying one they aren’t into on their blog and secretly celebrating it?
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
Felix Says:
Possible. There are more people who don’t blog than do blog.
At lunch we talked about who is special. We couldn’t come up with many special people. Truly special people, not people we want to screw LOL.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 2:41 pm
Handyman Says:
Not into valentine’s day unless I am very much in love. That only happened once.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 2:51 pm
Paige Says:
We have secret valentine at work. That’s it for me today.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
Gwen Says:
We didn’t do anything at work thank goodness. Probably because too many of us don’t get along. lmao
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
Bobbi Says:
Just another day. Same ole same ole.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
Felix Says:
21 - haven’t done that at work in a long time. #22 is probably the reason why.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
huggies Says:
Happy Valentine’s Day Tyme. XOXOXO
I enjoy the honest take you have on your articles.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 4:37 pm
Anil Says:
I’m about to leave to do my Valentine’s crap.
Happy vday sweetheart!
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 4:48 pm
Native Edition Says:
My boy just found out that the woman he just spent $900 on has another man.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 4:49 pm
Tyme White Says:
WOW, I’m sorry.
How did he find out?
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 4:52 pm
Native Edition Says:
He was over her place when the flower deliver came. Made her read the card.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 4:57 pm
Felix Says:
Damn, that sucks. Can he take back whatever he bought for $900?
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Tyme White Says:
Of all the days and after he spent the money. I hope he can get a refund. And he dumped her.Â
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 5:08 pm
Native Edition Says:
No he can’t get a refund. An exchange, but not a refund. If he doesn’t dump her Tyme, we’ll all clock him.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 5:31 pm
Felix Says:
There you go Tyme, suggesting the dump.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 6:06 pm
Tyme White Says:
Well, in some cases it works but she did it behind his back and he was surprised by it. Not only is there an issue of trust but what broke the relationship to cause her to look to someone else in the first place?
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 6:18 pm
Dennis V. Says:
#29, damn man, what a way to find out. tyme makes a valid point (more than good). funny, when i think about cheating i think about undo the sex. i never think about what caused the guy or gal to cheat in the first place.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 6:37 pm
Peggy Dale Says:
I’m not going out today. I have Thursday’s. My boyfriend and I broke up. Today I’m relaxing.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 8:46 pm
Jia Says:
My girls are going out tonight to celebrate. I agree Tyme, it isn’t a big deal.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 9:53 pm
Mortimus Says:
Valentine’s Day is horrible for the man because he wants to please his lady. If he screws up today it will haunt him for months.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 9:54 pm
Big Daddy Says:
@36 exactly. for the most part we want to make them happy. i’m talking about guys who really care about their women, not playboys.
Posted on February 14th, 2008 at 11:01 pm
Hurricane Says:
I accept Valentine’s Day like I imagine women accept washing windows. One of those chores a person has to do whether they like it or not.
Posted on February 15th, 2008 at 1:02 am